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I spoke to my dreamed and it taught me.
I dreamt I was being kissed and it felt good. The senses of my body tingling from the velvety caress of these blush, wet lips. It felt good to be touched. It felt good to be loved.
Opening the eyes of my dreaming body, I recognized the face of these lips - my friend - and so I recoiled. I felt weird. I felt inappropriate.
My springing back detached us abruptly. His face studying mine. He broke the silence.
How did it feel ?
How did what feel ?
The sensation of lips on your neck?
I didn’t know it was —
— no Brooks, how did it feel, not what did you think it should feel like but how do lips on your neck actually feel ?
I considered. Good, I guess but—
—of course it did. Are we not all made of the same stuff? Are not my lips as soft as hers ?
And I woke up.
Eyes wide open, I found my heart racing and my mind stumbling. I didn’t know what to make of this dream. I could just chalk it up to a weird dream… but dreams are not just movies, starring ourselves are they, no, they are speaking consciousness and if we listen and ask questions, it will talk and we will learn.
That morning, I walked with my dream. I ate with it. I showered with it.. It came with me to work. We spoke to each other, this dream and I, and in the middle of work the lesson came.
Life is not binary. It is no more male than it is female. It is no more Mother Earth than it is Father Earth, for it takes both to create life. Before X and Y life was the result of splitting of cells, for Billions of years.
I have all my life, I identified myself as male, fully masculine. I knew the feminine only through association to the female. I had never explored the feminine characteristics through my own gaze. What does it feel like to be sensuous, to be blind to my ego and to feel as my senses dictate. No thinking, just feeling my way into new parts of humanity.
This visual series are the captured moments of my exploration into the sensuous, into the characteristics that have conventionally been labeled as feminine and it has changed my conservative view of the spectrum of sexuality forever. I highly recommend it.
The moments created and captured in collaboration with the very talented Marissa Mooney http://www.marissamooney.com/